Comics & Condoms
by The Petulant Prodigy
Summary: In which Grimmjow the cosplaying comic book nerd meets Ichigo the eccentric manga artist. Nerd love at first site. It's pretty much crack. Eh. I'm not apologizing. AU, yaoi, swearing, happy fun times of the naked variety. A late birthday present for Racey!


_A one-shot gift for Racey. She wanted a flamboyant!Ichigo, so this is my take on him. Happy super-belated birthday, my love! I hope you enjoy xo_

* * *

**Comics & Condoms**

* * *

"Go fuck yourself!"

Grimmjow cackled into his wireless gaming headset, his rabbit warlock blasting a green frog goblin in a bout of holy fire that incinerated the mystical being in five seconds flat.

"What was that about warlocks having no decent offense in the Fifth Realm?" Grimmjow asked through the mouth piece, his left hand clicking buttons furiously while his right hovered over the mouse to change his game characters' perspective in rapid succession. He hadn't been playing World of Warbat for very long, but he'd caught on a lot faster than his best friend had anticipated.

"It's fuckin' true!"

"That's why I just kicked your ass."

"Whatever, ass hole."

Grimmjow chuckled, "Looks like pizza's on you tonight, Renj. Anyways, I gotta go."

"Yeah yeah, whatever. Yo, Snake Eyes working wit'cha today?"

Grimm rolled his eyes as he cracked his back: they'd been playing almost all night, the graveyard of falafel chip bags and Diet Mountain Dew cans ample proof, "Yah, later today."

"Well looks like I'll be seein' ya later today, then."

Grimmjow snorted, "At least buy something this time, ass hole."

"Yah yah, see ya later."

Grimmjow chuckled as his screen blipped, alerting Grimmjow that his adversary had just registered himself offline.

Grimmjow checked his stats before exiting out and tearing his headset off, running a hand through his hair and going straight to his training weights and punching bag. It was a regimen burned into him over the past five years, to help him stay in shape. He worked out every day, focusing on different muscle groups as to allow his other muscles time to heal. He wasn't a 'roid head or a gym hound, preferring to work out in his living room or run in the park late at night.

It was something he knew was psychological: he didn't like the thought of people watching him work out. He still thought about middle school and high school gym classes, how he'd get made fun of, how he'd always be last in a race. Boys calling him a fat faggot, chubby bunny, or worse, girls taking pity on him and trying to stand up for him.

It'd been horrible.

Not anymore, though.

He'd finally gotten his ass in gear, taking cues from his favorite comic and anime heroes: if you want something to change, you have to do something about it. He'd started slimming down because HE wanted to change, not because he wanted to impress anybody. He'd wanted to get healthy, to stop sitting and playing video games every day all day. Now he could play video games with a clear conscience as long as he worked out and continued to eat healthy.

It didn't happen overnight, but Grimmjow never gave up. It had been years now.

Comics had always been a thing for him, but with the shop came the exposure to manga and anime as well. The friends he'd started to gain through nerdy means had introduced him to the world of conventions and cosplay: honestly, he hadn't expected to like it, but it had been great motivation to get in shape, as he wanted to look like the characters he was dressing up as.

Now his closet was nearly bursting with cosplay outfits he'd either gotten off Ebay or sewn his damn self thanks to his fellow cosplay freak friends who had taught him to sew and do leather work in the dead of night during anime marathons.

One of his friends had even made him a cosplay page on a fan site. He had slowly gained a following, and Grimmjow had been embarrassed about it at first, but now it was just flattering and awesome.

He couldn't wait for the next con, actually. He'd be cosplaying Captain America with his cosplay group. Their Black Widow, Nel, had demanded he be the sexy patriot, even though he'd had his heart set on Thor. Renji had already called dibs though. And Jinta had snatched up Hawk Eye before he could blink, and Grimmjow didn't have the patience to build a suit of armor, even though Iron Man was his favorite Avenger by far. He'd spent way too much money at the theatre seeing Iron Man 3. His friends still teased him about his celebrity crush.

So The Captain had been his only option since having Ulquiorra be anybody other than Loki was a travesty against humanity. He had the whole evil smirk thing down so pat it was downright scary. And Grimmjow wasn't about painting himself green to pull off Hulk, so Captain America it was. Not that Grimmjow had anything against the Captain, far from it. He had the best ass in the Avengers by far.

But when he'd posted a pic of his work in progress on the suit, everybody had agreed that he made a damn good Captain, even without the blonde wig. Blue hair on blue eyes and red, white and blue spandex. More than a few people had commented "num" and "yummy" in the feed that it had Grimmjow blushing.

It was his first time wearing spandex: shit wasn't as bad as he'd thought it'd be, but with his body history, he just kept thinking back to the days where he couldn't even wear his favorite super hero t-shirts 'cuz they didn't come in a big enough size.

Yup. Things had certainly fucking changed.

When he was finished lifting, he made his way through his tiny apartment to his bathroom, taking a quick shower. He didn't bother wrapping a towel around himself as he wandered back to his bedroom. The walls were absolutely covered by movie, anime, and gaming posters. He slipped on a pair of Batman boxers before rummaging through his closet for a clean work tee. Kisuke's Comics was the best damn comic shop in all of Karakura, and Grimmjow fucking loved it.

In his opinion, it was the best job ever. He'd started in middle school, stayed through high school, and now even that he'd graduated college with a double bachelors in English and Philosophy, he still didn't want to give it up. In many ways, the comic shop had changed his life.

If Grimmjow was being completely honest with himself, it had SAVED his life.

He pulled a black v-neck over his head that read _GO NERD OR GO HOME_ in big white block lettering with the Kisuke's Comics logo on the back. He finished it off with a pair of green cut off jeans and his Joker and Batman high top Converse.

With one last look in the mirror, he winked at himself before heading to the shop. He was never late.

* * *

It was a Saturday, so the place was packed. Every Saturday the shop was flooded at noon for different card game tournaments and new comic issue releases. It was mostly a teenage crowd, but there were quite a few college and adult customers milling the racks and walls of the shop. Kisuke had decided to have a staircase built in and expanded to a half upper floor that housed anime, foreign films, and Korean dramas.

Shelves and stacks of graphic novels, comic books, and manga everywhere. It was paradise.

They had a snack section, plushie section, gaming section, anything and everything related to nerdvana. It was the Mecca of Karakura nerds, and Grimmjow was one of its oldest employees.

Kisuke didn't label things, but in the eyes of everybody that worked there, Grimmjow was a manager of sorts. He did most of the ordering, decided what was coming in bulk, what was hot, what wasn't. It was a successful shop, but a small one, so the employee team was small and family-like. Grimmjow, his cousin Jinta, Kisuke's partner Kenpachi, and the new guy Gin were the only employees. Ururu, Kisuke and Kenpachi's daughter, sometimes came in on weekends to help with display setup and help clean, but she wasn't full time (which was good, 'cuz Jinta picked on her, and Grimmjow didn't tolerate bullies. Not anymore.)

So most of the day was spent chatting with the regulars, ringing up Pocky and other cheap otaku stuff, and selling mostly new weekly releases. The place started slowing around four when the Yugioh tournament ended, a few teenagers milling around talking comics or talking shit about the next Wolverine movie due out soon.

"Yo, Gin, I'ma grab some boxes from the back."

"Mah, alright," Gin answered, studiously manning the front counter with that mysterious smirk. Renji was leaning against the counter, a Deadpool comic in his hand as he tried to keep Gin's attention. It was hilarious, but also sad. Gin had been working at the shop for just over a month and Renji had declared it as love at first sight. He was tenacious, that was for damn sure, but he didn't know how to ask somebody out to save his life.

Grimmjow hoped Gin would stop playing with him soon and just flat out ask him on a date. If it didn't happen in the next couple of days, Grimmjow was gonna do it for him.

Grimmjow shook his head and got back to work.

* * *

"Dude, Deadpool shouldn't even fuckin' count! I don't even think you can technically say he's an X Men."

"He's an X Men."

"For like five fuckin' minutes, ass hat. 'Sides, what about that issue of him killing the Marvel universe? That shit was legit, he has no allegiances, that's what makes him so bad ass!"

"Don't be stupid, Gambit's better."

"Nah, Storm for me."

"But Halle Barry butchered her in the movies. She's not that soft in the comics!"

"She's hot."

"She butchered Cat Woman too."

All three boys cringed, not wanting to think about how absolutely terrible the remake of Cat Woman was. Especially Ichigo who had NOOOOOO desire to think about scantily clad women.

Scantily clad men, however…

Ichigo popped his gum, thumbing through another graphic novel. He'd decided he needed a comic fix to get out of his weeklong slump. His two best friends, Shiro and Shinji, couldn't have agreed more and had decided to go with him. Ichigo usually hit up the local book shops, but his friends had been trying to get him to come into this comic shop for ages, so he'd agreed to check this one out.

Ichigo thumbed through another one, his eyes scanning the style. He had a similar drawing style to this artist and liked to look at his work for reference. Ignorant morons called it copying, but it wasn't like that. Three years into college and Ichigo had FINALLY decided to pursue his dream of creating his own graphic novel series. He'd been drawing his entire life, and friends had always encouraged him, but now he was truly dedicated to his art. After graduating, he'd started a website and had just released the first part of his series. It was extremely low budget, simple black and white, but he'd poured his heart and soul into it, spending hours on shading and toner. Shiro's dad had connections with a printing company and had gotten him a pretty decent deal. Now to promote himself, he traveled to different conventions all over the country, building his fan base slowly but surely. He was nearly done with the second installment, but had hit incredible writer's block and had been moping for days. His hands were itching to draw, but the scene wouldn't come to him, and he couldn't force himself to draw something he couldn't see.

Art didn't work that way. At least, Ichigo hoped it didn't.

His friends wrote it off as him being a drama queen. After all, Ichigo was pretty flamboyant. He had died his obnoxious orange hair purple this month. He was wearing white skinny jeans, a tank top that said _LUSCIOUS LUMPS_ with a picture of Lumpy Space Princess from Adventure Time on it, and beaded rainbow bracelets on both arms, not to mention he was rocking his usual metallic purple glitter eyeliner.

His mother liked to joke that he'd come out the womb with glitter and jazz hands.

So it surprised people to know that he was best friends with Shiro, a local bad boy who looked like he beat up fags every day before breakfast with his numerous tattoos, demon eyes, and bad attitude.

And Shinji, who had gotten Most Likely To Be A Millionaire in high school with his stupid ties and extreme smarts. Plus, he came from money, so he was already rich and was probably the only reason Ichigo's manga was getting anywhere in the world with his business brain.

So, yeah, they tended to turn heads when they went places, and the comic book shop was no different.

"Yo, Gin! Any new releases taday?" Shiro called to the silver-haired boy by the register.

"Got a couple in yesterday," Gin said, pointing at the New Releases rack, "Check 'em out."

"M'kay," Shiro called, smirking at the irritated tattooed red head whose eyes had narrowed at the albino.

Ichigo shook his head: Shiro sure liked to get into trouble. The red head didn't look like a pushover, so Shiro was playing with some fire by getting between that obvious crush.

Ichigo hopped up the stairs to the second level of the shop, browsing the yaoi collection. He'd just picked one DVD up to read when he heard a box drop an aisle over, the employee grabbing merchandise and moving it around to their proper places and stocking the shelf.

"It's buy one get one half off this weekend," he said.

Ichigo felt his fucking toes curl. A voice like that was Biblical, like Satan tempting Jesus in the desert.

Low and gorgeous and just…_UMF._

Ichigo ran his eyes over the gorgeous shop employee, his artist's eye not disappointed. The guy was tall and Christ on a bike, HAWT. He was wearing the employee t-shirt, cut-off green jeans, high top Chucks, and had thick, black-rimmed glasses. His gorgeous blue hair was shaved on the sides, like a chaotic cotton candy faux hawk. Not only that, the boy had Pokeball gauges and his left arm was sleeved in Nintendo characters: Toad, Yoshi, Kirby.

This was his future husband.

His lanyard read "Grimm".

He must've been staring longer than he thought 'cuz Grimm tilted his head slightly, staring the purple head down, "You need help finding something?"

Yeah, but your pants are in the way, future husband.

Stall, come up with something!

"Yeah, actually," Ichigo dug in his messenger bag, pulling free a homemade business card and a copy of his graphic novel, "I'm just getting this series on it's feet, or, well, trying to, so I was wondering if it was cool to leave a few of them in the shop for people to check out?"

Ichigo tried not to cream his pants as Grimm brushed his hand grabbing the material, his eyes looking through the graphic novel, flipping pages before looking at the business card.

"How many copies you wanna leave? And are you charging?"

"I've got about ten with me right now. I can bring more later if it's cool," Ichigo said with a winning smile. He knew what his smiles did to people, "And yeah, only 700 yen. I'm local and it covers printing."

Grimm flipped through the first few pages again, his eyes scanning over one of Ichigo's characters, "You should charge more."

Ichigo smirked, "Well, for now, I gotta build my name. Eventually it should turn into profit, right?"

"Yeah, we can put 'em by the register for now until I talk to the owner, but it should be cool," Grimm said, digging his hand into his back pocket and pulling out some yen and holding it out to Ichigo.

Ichigo's eyebrows pulled together, "What's that for?"

"First customer of the day," Grimm answered with a sharp grin, "I'm a slut for shadow and shading, and your line work is solid. A lot of artists are afraid to use thick lines, I like it."

"Marry me," Ichigo blurted.

Grimm raised an eyebrow. Ichigo had never wanted to lick an eyebrow before in his life, but there was a first time for everything, he supposed.

"Seriously, you're way too cute," Ichigo continued, knowing it was too late to back out of what he'd said.

Grimm shrugged, "I like to think I know talent when I see it. Smooth and gritty, not an easy combination."

Ichigo could watch this guy flip through the book all day, his glasses edging farther down his nose as he studied an action scene. He finally flipped it closed and pulled a pen out of his side pocket, clicking it open, "Sign it for me?"

Ichigo's mango eyes widened, "You serious?"

Grimm laughed and _damn_, yup, Ichigo _definitely_ felt his dick stir, "Yah, I'm serious. This is gonna be worth some big money some day, right?"

Ichigo grinned back, signing the inside cover, personalizing it before sliding it back to Grimm with a wink, "Nice doing business with you, Grimm."

"You too, Ichigo," Grimm replied, sliding the business card into his back pocket.

Ichigo waved and chuckled before going down the stairs and making his way to his friends who were deep into a heated debate with the angry-looking red head over whether or not Vin Deisel would make a good Martian Man Hunter for a Justice League movie.

Grimm flipped the little manga he'd just bought open, checking out the signature and feeling a smile blow up on his own face.

_TO GRIMM, MY FUTURE HUSBAND! XO –KUROSAKI ICHIGO_

Followed by a phone number. Not to mention Grimm had the number on the business card as well.

Who said nerds couldn't find dates?

* * *

It was almost three weeks before Grimmjow ran into the interesting mangaka again.

And to think it'd be at an anime convention.

Grimmjow had been working his way through the artist alley, a block of tables set up in the merchandise room where various artists sold original art, manga, and fan art. Grimm had already managed to spend half his weekend money on Samurai Champloo and Hellsing fan art and a Loki pillow. No, he would NOT apologize for being attracted to Loki. Thankfully Nel had had room in her backpack for his shit, being the smartest out of the group knowing she'd go bat shit insane in the dealer's room, spending every cent she'd made over the past week on anime and pocky.

And the Captain suit sure as hell didn't have any pockets or anywhere to hide anything.

He had just decided coming to an anime convention a month after the release of The Avengers movie cosplaying The Avengers had been a dumb idea. Yeah, they loved playing the characters and being the characters, but they couldn't walk five steps as a group without getting stopped for a picture. It was flattering, it really was, but Grimmjow wasn't the best people person and having cameras flash in his face all day was starting to get on his nerves. He'd been getting mauled all day by crazy ass fan girls (and quite a few boys). Nel got more than a few ass grabs and Jinta was getting cranky too, so they'd decided to split up for a while, it was less likely to draw attention or pictures so they could mill about, shop, or go to panels in peace.

Not so much for Grimmjow. He was still getting stopped every couple feet, even though he'd taken the mask part off and had strapped the shield to his back to free up his hands.

A giggling flock of cat-eared girls had just left him when Grimm heard amused laughter.

"You look like you need a break, Spangles."

Grimmjow turned towards the voice, hoping his jaw wasn't unhinged. Ichigo was sitting behind a table; his artwork on one side to flip through while his manga was on the other. His chest glowed with an Iron Man arc reactor, a black collared shirt rolled to his elbows, and his purple hair streaked with black. Grimm could see the kid had decided to paint his nails a powder blue.

Grimm liked to fancy it was the same color as his own hair.

Grimm wasn't sure if he licked his lips or not, but maybe he did if Ichigo's smirk was anything to go by.

Ichigo patted the empty seat next to him behind the booth, "It's calling your name."

Grimmjow snorted, taking the artist up on his offer, although he didn't really know what to say to the kid. He'd meant to call him sometime over the past week, but had been really busy getting ready for the con, not to mention intimidated. Despite what people thought about him, he wasn't a very forward person. Nel tried to psychoanalyze him all the time, telling him it was leftover from his days where he'd been uncomfortable in his own body. Grimmjow knew he could flirt his ass off, but he never really knew how to pursue people. It was a bit confusing. He liked blunt people.

Maybe that was why he was finding himself so attracted to this manga artist.

Ichigo took a sip from an iced tea bottle, "So, there a reason you haven't called me? Is it the glitter? I think it's the glitter."

Ichigo peeked at Grimmjow over the rims of his Aviators, showing off shimmering blue-rimmed eyes that matched his nails.

"Or you're not gay, but honestly, Grimm, that would be a damn shame. And it would make me look like a total jack ass."

Grimmjow gulped, willing himself not to get an erection in a spandex Captain America suit. Just…_NO._ He couldn't handle the embarrassment. It'd be a humiliation similar to his body-image days.

Grimmjow must've been blushing because Ichigo let out a super-unmanly squeal and rested his head on a hand, smirking, "Oh baby, I hope you're just shy, 'cuz you are just WAY too adorable right now."

It was silent for a beat before Grimmjow mumbled, "I was gonna call you, but…I dunno. I wasn't sure how interested you were…"

Ichigo's smile was slow and dangerous, "Oh my god, sweetie, I'd ride you 'til my spine was out of alignment if there weren't so many kiddies running around this convention hall right now."

Grimmjow's face must've showed how embarrassed he was because Ichigo huffed, "Sorry. Shi and Shin tell me I'm a lil' too honest sometimes. Sorry for the dramatics, but I think you're my type, actually, scratch that, I won't take no for an answer, Captain. We're going on a date, that good with you?"

Grimmjow felt himself nodding, which made Ichigo smile so big it made Grimmjow's stomach get all fidgety.

Ichigo leaned into him, pecking him on the mouth.

Grimmjow licked his lips. Tasted like cherry.

"_AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"_

Grimmjow and Ichigo both jumped and turned towards the two girls in front of the table who'd whipped out their phones, _"OHMYGAWD STONY!_ Can you do it again? We ship them _SO HARD!"_

Grimmjow didn't have time to reply as Ichigo swooped in, capturing his mouth in a sexy, slow, smoldering kiss, Ichigo's fingers digging into his hair and tugging.

"Mmm…" Ichigo murmured, ending the kiss with a nip on Grimmjow's bottom lip, "I ship them too."

Grimmjow was surprised the girls hadn't fainted they were screaming so hard. That kiss had been so good he'd completely forgotten why Ichigo had kissed him in the first place.

The girls bought some of Ichigo's Captain America / Iron Man fan art, a couple of them super promiscuous. Grimmjow flipped through the other books, looking at the manga-styled art of various pairings.

It was all yaoi with a few yuri thrown in for good measure, but Grimm wasn't complaining. There were also a ton of bad ass ink drawings of various anime, game, and tv characters.

Every pairing was something Grimmjow would, or did, ship. Almost every character in the book Grimmjow had a soft spot for, or could talk about for days. So they did talk. For hours. They were like nerd soul mates.

He tried to get Ichigo to sell him a mafia rendition of Toad, his favorite Nintendo character, holding guns and looking all bad ass even with a mushroom hat, but Ichigo just rolled it up and shoved it into his hand, telling him he could have it.

"Fine. I'll buy you dinner tonight, then."

"Oh, you will, huh?" Ichigo teased.

"Yeah, 'cuz I'm taking you out."

Ichigo smirked, "Sounds like a date."

* * *

"Aha, oh man, King, you gonna fuck Captain America? All your fan boy dreams 'bout 'ta come true!" Shiro crooned, shrugging his blue jacket off. He'd decided at the last minute to cosplay Spike Spiegel from Cowboy Bebop and forced Shinji to be his Ed.

Shinji hadn't complained too much, though, considering he was long, lanky, and his ass looked amazing in those tiny black shorts.

Which Shiro was currently trying to pry off of him with his teeth.

"Ah! Babe, stop!" Shinji growled, tugging at his boyfriend's ash hair to get him to quit.

Ichigo rolled his eyes at his friends. They were back at the hotel room, getting showers and planning to hit the hotel bar where Ichigo was supposed to meet Grimmjow for an impromptu date.

Ugh. Call him a slut, but Ichigo hadn't been kidding earlier. He honestly was surprised he'd managed to ride in the elevator with that delicious nerd without getting on his knees and sucking him off before they reached their floor.

They were staying in the convention's host hotel, just different floors. And Ichigo was thankful he'd talked Shinji and Shiro out of the room for the night 'cuz there was no way if the night progressed back to Grimmjow's room, that they wouldn't be cock-blocked by the five or six people crashing in that room.

"Yes, I'm going to fuck Captain America. Got a problem with that?" Ichigo said, removing the arc reactor from his chest and turning it off so he didn't waste the LED battery. He needed a shower and maybe a shave down there, he wasn't sure yet.

"Wear the fuck-me-pants. And don't forget the lube," Shinji said helpfully, bending down to dig through one of his bags and tossing a sealed clear bottle to Ichigo at the same time Shiro twisted onto the edge of the second bed and bit his boyfriend on his ass through the tiny shorts.

"I'm gonna take a long shower," Ichigo winked at his 'twin', listening to him cackle.

He'd just slammed the bathroom door shut when he heard Shinji comment that he couldn't fuck in his cosplay.

"Why the fuck not? !" Shiro whined. Apparently he had a booty shorts addiction.

"Because! That's _SOOOOO_ wrong! Ed's, like, _12 YEARS OLD!_ And a _GIRL!_ And Spike's like, 30."

"But we're still us. At least keep the goggles on, babe."

"Fine. Only if you keep the tie on."

"Deal."

* * *

Grimmjow sat at the hotel bar, working his way through a rum and coke. The day had been busy and slightly annoying until he'd spent time with Ichigo. Now they were going to spend even more time together, which Grimmjow didn't mind at all.

He'd taken a shower and changed into black board shorts and a white tank that said _IF DARYL DIES WE RIOT._ He was a hardcore Walking Dead fan, had been since laying hands on the comics in high school. He had to represent, after all. He was still trying to convince his cosplay group to do Walking Dead, but Nel thought it was a gross show and couldn't watch it long enough to like the characters, and Renji and him would fight to the death over who got to cosplay Daryl Dixon. Nobody wanted to be that crazy ass hat Shane or Rick, and Jinta had been offended at being told to be Glenn (well he WAS the shortest and Asian, so…whatever).

Anyways, Grimm was brought back to reality when he heard the stool next to him drag and Ichigo popped in next to him, his eyes hooded and that **DAMN SEXY SMIRK**_ Jesus the kid had cock lips…_

"Hiii," he sing-songed, snapping his fingers in the bartender's direction, "Don't you look sexy out of uniform. Mm, Walking Dead. I can't wait for the next season, but I swear on all that is holy, if they even THINK of trying to hook that man meat up with that sniveling twit Carol, I will throw myself off the nearest cliff."

Grimmjow snorted and silently agreed while Ichigo's attention diverted immediately to the bartender for two Lemon Drops, two Sperm Banks, and a Long Island.

"What? I can't do shots by myself," Ichigo winked, sliding one of the yellow-tinted shots towards Grimm when the bartender came back. He clinked the shot glasses together, "To a fun night with a fun guy." Ichigo shot it back like a pro and licked his lips. Grimmjow took his shot, enjoying the lemonade-sour flavor.

The next shot was new territory for Grimmjow.

Apparently a Sperm Bank was vodka with eye drops of Irish crème, and yah, it was kinda gross how much it looked like jizz, but it was too funny to pass up.

Ichigo clinked their glasses together, smirking, "To a fun morning with a fun guy."

Grimmjow took the shot with Ichigo, listening to him giggle, his body hot at the implications of the statement.

"So, can you please please please explain how you're single?" Ichigo asked, taking a sip from his Long Island, "I don't get it. You're sexy, smart, and know more about comic books than some comic book companies. I can't even count how many nerdgasms you gave me today."

Grimmjow shrugged, "Just a loaner type, that's all."

Ichigo smirked, "Yeah, you got that whole 'dark-and-mysterious' mojo going for you. Must intimidate people."

"Not you."

"Nope," Ichigo said, chewing on the end of his straw and GODDAMMIT they hadn't even ordered food yet and Grimmjow was already ready to fuck the kid senseless.

Especially if he was gonna have an unconscious oral fixation. **FUCK.**

"You hear me, Grimm?"

"Huh?"

"Onion rings to start?" Ichigo said with laughing eyes.

The. Little. Fucker.

"Sounds good," Grimm grunted.

* * *

About three and a half hours later, Ichigo was slamming Grimmjow into the corner of the mirrored elevator, his tongue down his throat and grinding into him like tonight was the last night he'd ever get to fuck.

To be fair, Grimm was feeling the same way.

Grimmjow gripped at Ichigo's hips, his fingers running back to his ass and squeezing. Ichigo whined and Grimmjow swore to himself that he'd make Ichigo make that noise at LEAST a thousand times more tonight.

The doors binged open on Ichigo's floor.

"Come on," Ichigo tugged Grimmjow with such strength Grimmjow's nerd brain was envisioning vampire, or maybe werewolf!Ichigo, like some True Blood shit.

Grimmjow wasn't sure how he was walking since all of his blood was currently in his dick, but somehow, he waddled after Ichigo, his vice-like grip unbreakable to begin with.

Ichigo slid his card, slamming the door open and tugging Grimmjow in, pushing him towards the bed. Grimmjow held in a yell of surprise as his body weight flew back into the bed sheets, an impatient Ichigo already halfway up his hips, grinding into him, his mouth on his neck.

"Ffffuuuck, Ichigo!"

"Hm, yeah," Ichigo ground down into Grimmjow, his eyes playful and eager, "There's gonna be a lot of that, I'm afraid."

Grimmjow watched as Ichigo peeled his t-shirt off, revealed pierced nipples and a pierced navel, a Zelda charm dangling from his belly button.

Grimmjow couldn't help but smirk at that, flicking it with his finger, Ichigo's kohl-rimmed eyes hooded, his breathing stuttered.

"I got one too," Grimmjow said, opening his mouth and showing off his Link tongue stud.

Ichigo groaned, rocking his hips down again, "Fuckin'A, Spangles, just fucking marry me already."

Grimmjow grinned, working at Ichigo's pants buttons, but not getting very far. They were tight red leather pants, just screaming all kinds of demon sex god. He couldn't even –

"Take em' off," Grimmjow practically snarled.

Ichigo laughed, hopping up off of Grimmjow to shimmy out of those disgustingly sexy pants, peeling his legs out like a personal strip tease.

And that was it, no underwear, nothing.

"You have to go commando in these pants. Obviously," Ichigo winked.

Grimmjow honestly feared for his dick's safety it was so hard.

"What'cha waiting for, Spangles?" Ichigo asked, hands on his hips as he nodded his head at Grimmjow's clothed crotch.

Grimmjow sat up, tugging his tank top over his head and tossing it. It landed on the lampshade. He'd always wanted to do that for some reason.

He slipped out of the cargo shorts easily, tugging his boxers down at the same time.

There was a moment where Ichigo was just staring at him, his eyes raking over him and Grimmjow had a moment of self-consciousness, his brain hurdling him back to high school where guys in his class called him a sexless nerd, a comic book virgin.

He wasn't a slut, but he'd been with several people, boys and girls alike since he'd stopped caring what other people thought of him, embraced his nerdy-ness, and gained some confidence.

But he'd never wanted to fuck somebody on first site, not like Ichigo.

"You clean, gorgeous?" Ichigo asked, tugging a condom out of a wrapper.

Where'd that come from? He must've been out of it longer then he thought.

"Yah."

"Good. Me too," Ichigo said, throwing the condom over his shoulder without a second thought. Grimmjow thought it was a little dangerous: they didn't know each other THAT well, what if he'd been lying?

But for some reason he really did trust this eccentric artist with fuck me pants.

"One last thing," Ichigo went to the dresser and a light glowed on his face. Grimmjow realized it was an ipod. Ichigo smirked and set it back in the dock, the speakers picking up the music.

Ah. It made Grimmjow grin. "Eat You Up" by BoA. Pretty damn sexy.

"I love this song," Ichigo grinned, crawling over Grimmjow and attacking his mouth.

Grimmjow didn't think he'd ever get used to how voracious Ichigo was, how aggressive. It was awesome and amazing and absolutely sexy.

Grimmjow couldn't help it: he started grinding up into the sexy heat, Ichigo's mouth falling open as their erections rubbed against each other.

Grimmjow bit the side of his neck, a nip of affection that had Ichigo gasping. Grimmjow licked over it and ground down into Ichigo's pelvis at the same time, making Ichigo convulse.

"Umf – Grimm – _FUCK ME,"_ Ichigo demanded, his legs wrapping around Grimmjow's waist and pulling him in tight, causing a friction so sweet Grimmjow was afraid he was gonna cream before he got inside.

"Fuck, Ichigo."

"Mmhm," Ichigo pursed, pistoning his hips and rocking in all the right ways to drive Grimmjow absolutely out of his mind.

"Turn around," Ichigo demanded.

"What?"

"I'm gonna explode, Grimm, but I don't have the patience to wait until after I suck your dick. But I wanna suck your dick, so turn the fuck around."

Grimmjow shuddered, wondering if Ichigo was in fact a seme with that listen-or-else tone. Grimmjow wasn't sure what Ichigo meant by him turning around, unless he meant…?

"69?"

Ichigo laughed, "Fuck yeah."

Grimmjow scrambled up and around so fast Ichigo chuckled again.

Grimmjow had barely braced his hands to steady himself when he felt Ichigo swallow his dick.

"OH GodDAMMIT…"

Ichigo hummed approval, making Grimmjow jerk down into that wet, hot heat, his face falling into a musky orange-pubed erection. For a moment it was so hilarious to Grimmjow that he laughed, choking Ichigo.

Ichigo popped off Grimmjow's dick, "What the fuck is so funny?"

"Your pubes are orange!"

"Oh my GAWD, Grimmjow, focus! I wanna cum sometime before Christmas, you ass hole!"

"Relax, Ginger," Grimmjow teased, licking the crown of Ichigo's dick and making him jerk up and sigh, "Captain America will take care of you."

Ichigo tried to laugh but it didn't really work because Grimmjow chose that moment to suck his dick like it was a Tootsie roll pop.

As if reading his mind, Grimmjow said, "How many licks does it take to get to the center?"

"Oh my gawd, I'm being blue-balled by philosophical Captain America."

"One," Grimmjow said, swiping his tongue across the head and jerking his hand, making Ichigo hiss, "Two, three…" each time taking a shallow lick and pumping his hand, making Ichigo practically scream in frustration.

"GRIMMJOW I AM GOING TO KILL YOU!"

Grimmjow decided Ichigo was extremely sexy when he was angry.

So he moved his face farther down and licked a stripe over Ichigo's hole, making Ichigo jerk so hard Grimmjow was surprised he didn't fly off the bed, but he did wince as his dick seemed to slap Ichigo in the face, his dick so sensitive it felt like getting pinched.

"Ow! Ow, ow, my _eye!"_

Grimmjow couldn't help it, he rolled off of Ichigo, laughing so hard he could barely breathe. He crawled over to a scowling Ichigo who was rubbing at his watery eye.

"It's not funny, ass hat! Pre cum stings like a motherfucker!"

Grimmjow kissed his cheek, "I'm sorry, but it was technically your own fault."

"How, genius?"

"You never been licked down there before?"

Ichigo's face turned tomato red, making Grimmjow smile.

Grimmjow kissed him on the lips before tugging Ichigo to sit up, pushing his hair back from his face and kissing him silly.

"How 'bout we keep it simple for now?" Grimmjow asked, pulling Ichigo closer to him. Ichigo got the hint and faced Grimmjow, both of them sitting up, his legs going over Grimmjow's thighs till their groins were as close as possible. Grimmjow grabbed their flagging erections and pumped them together, Ichigo's arms wrapping around Grimmjow's neck as he whined at the contact.

Ichigo kissed him, Grimmjow's hand trying to keep a pace that would satisfy both of them. He didn't know how close Ichigo was, but he knew he was almost over the edge, a tension building up in his belly that was almost uncomfortable it was so intense, but he didn't want it to end yet.

"Not enough," Ichigo murmured, spitting into his hand and rubbing it over Grimmjow's dick, "Gawd, it's'not enough-"

Grimmjow groaned as Ichigo pushed him onto his back, straddling him, his wet fingers coating Grimmjow as much as possible before Ichigo guided the slick erection to his hole.

"Wait, wait Ichigo, that's –"

Ichigo's mouth fell open in an O before he hissed, trying to force Grimmjow's head inside him. It finally gave when Ichigo moved his hips at a slighter angle. He was breathing hard, but he must've given into the temptation to be done with it and forced himself the rest of the way down, letting out a whimper, tears springing in his eyes as he tried to adjust.

"Fffffuuuuuck," Grimmjow moaned, his fingers digging into Ichigo's hipbones. He had to stay still, he had to stay still, he had to stay still…

"Okay, okay, go," Ichigo whined, whipping at one of his eyes as he pistoned his hips. Grimmjow felt like all the wind had been knocked out of him. Ichigo's insides were a vice on him: Ichigo had practically taken him dry, no prep done to himself, that could've hurt both of them.

Grimmjow gently thrust upwards, testing the waters.

Ichigo grunted. Was that negative or positive?

"Ok, ok ok, MOVE," Ichigo ordered, kissing Grimmjow as they began to move their hips together.

"Shit," Grimmjow growled as he finally found a rhythm. He pushed himself up, chest to chest with Ichigo as they thrust against each other, Ichigo's hands digging into his hair and tugging and DAMN it felt good.

Ichigo was practically chanting, definitely the most vocal lover Grimmjow had ever encountered, and he loved it.

He whispered into Ichigo's ear, "I'm inside you."

"Fucking hell!" Ichigo screamed, his whole body jerking as he came between them, Grimmjow's hands not even on his dick.

Grimmjow hissed at the contracting muscles milking him, he couldn't hold on anymore, not with Ichigo looking and sounding like this. He groaned, cupping Ichigo's ass as he thrust two more times, cumming inside him.

He hadn't even asked. Shit.

"Nnnn," Ichigo hummed, "You're inside me."

"Jesus Christ," Grimmjow murmured, kissing the secret ginger, his tongue attacking his mouth like it owed him money, "It's illegal to be this sexy. It's a crime."

"Does that mean you have to take me away in handcuffs?" Ichigo purred, his arms wrapped around Grimmjow and nuzzling their noses together.

Oh shit. This kid was gonna be the death of him.

He started to shift, ready to detangle himself, but Ichigo held him in place. GODDAMN the ginger was strong.

"No! Just a while longer. I like this feeling," Ichigo said sleepily, seeming unbothered by a dick still clogging up his cum hole.

"Ok."

"And Grimm?"

"Yah."

"I have a suit."

Grimmjow wasn't sure what the fuck that was supposed to mean, "Uh…ok?"

Ichigo leaned into Grimmjow's ear, "An Iron Man suit. It's not done yet, but it'll be ready for the next con. There's no way in _hell _I'm letting _you_ in a Captain America suit and sexy _me_ in an Iron Man suit go to waste."

* * *

**1 Year Later**

"Do you, Kurosaki Ichigo, take Jaegerjaques Grimmjow to be your husband?"

"Duh," said Ichigo, placing a ring on Grimmjow's finger.

"And do you, Jaegerjaques Grimmjow, take Kurosaki Ichigo to be your husband?"

"Hell yes," Grimmjow said, putting the matching band on Ichigo's finger.

"By all the power vested in me, I now pronounce you married in the eyes of the Marvel Universe. You may now stick your tongues down each other's throats and break everybody's hearts."

Cheers erupted around the room as Ichigo and Grimmjow kissed in front of the boy cosplaying as the Pope, all their friends and a ton of screaming fan girls and boys throwing Pocky sticks and confetti.

"May I present to you Mr. And Mr. Iron Captain!" the Pope boy called over the cheers.

Grimmjow laughed as he saw Nel had tears in her eyes while Ulquiorra looked menacing in his Loki gear. Most of their friends had set this whole thing up at the convention, making it a surprise for them, and they'd gone along with it. They'd been dating for a year, and this was the convention where they…well, sealed the deal, in more ways than one. Ichigo's eye still stung thinking about it.

But the Green Lantern rings were real, the commitment was real, and the relationship was real.

And really, who says nerds can't find happiness?

* * *

The End.


End file.
